What This Website Is (and Isn’t)

It is:

  • Clear, compassionate, and non-judgmental

  • Survivor-centered and trauma-informed

  • Honest about boundaries and limitations

 

It is NOT:

  • A rejection of people

  • Shaming or moralizing

  • Cold or legalistic

Who I Serve

I work with individuals and families who are seeking support, education, and advocacy related to domestic violence, coercive control, and other forms of abuse.

I may be a good fit for you if you:

  • Are experiencing or have experienced domestic violence, dating violence, or coercive control

  • Have endured emotional, verbal, sexual, spiritual, or psychological abuse

  • Feel confused, isolated, or overwhelmed and want clarity about abuse dynamics

  • Are seeking advocacy support, safety planning, resources, or accompaniment

  • Want support that is trauma-informed, survivor-centered, and respectful of your autonomy

  • Are looking for an advocate who acknowledges the role faith, culture, and lived experience may play in your healing

  • Want empowerment and information—not pressure, judgment, or control

You do not need to be in crisis to reach out. You do not need to know what you want yet. Curiosity, uncertainty, and mixed emotions are welcome here.

Who I May Not Be a Good Fit For

To provide ethical and effective advocacy, it’s important for me to be clear about my boundaries and scope of practice.

I may not be the best fit if you are:

  • Seeking mental health therapy, diagnosis, or clinical treatment

  • Looking for couples or family counseling where abuse is present

  • Wanting someone to tell you what to do, make decisions for you, or confront your abuser on your behalf

  • Seeking advocacy services for the purpose of monitoring, controlling, or retaliating against another person

  • Currently in need of immediate crisis intervention or emergency services (please call 911 or a local crisis line in those situations)

This does not mean you don’t deserve support—it simply means a different type of support may serve you better. When appropriate, I am happy to help connect you with resources that align with your needs.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I have to be ready to leave my relationship to work with you?

No. You do not need to be ready to leave—or even sure that what you’re experiencing is abuse. Many people reach out simply because something doesn’t feel right. Advocacy is about clarity, support, and choice, not pressure or ultimatums.

Is what I’m experiencing “bad enough” to reach out?

If you’re asking yourself that question, it’s enough to reach out. Abuse is not defined by severity or visible harm. Emotional abuse, coercive control, spiritual abuse, and psychological manipulation are real and harmful—even when there are no physical injuries.

Do you tell me what to do?

No. I will never tell you what you should do. My role is to provide education, support, and options so you can make informed decisions that are right for you and your situation. You are the expert of your own life.

Is this therapy or counseling?

No. I provide domestic violence advocacy and education, not mental health therapy or clinical counseling. While my work is trauma-informed and informed by my education in psychology, I do not diagnose, treat, or provide psychotherapy. If you are seeking therapy, I can help you explore appropriate referrals.

Can you help with safety planning?

Yes. Safety planning is a core part of advocacy. This may include emotional safety, digital safety, spiritual safety, and practical considerations—tailored to your unique circumstances and readiness.

Is faith required to work with you?

No. Faith is not a requirement. While my work is informed by my beliefs and values, I support people of all faith backgrounds—or none at all. You will never be pressured, preached at, or shamed.

What if I’ve been hurt by a church or faith community?

You are not alone. Spiritual abuse is real and deeply painful. I approach these experiences with care, validation, and respect, and I do not minimize harm done in the name of religion.

Is what I share confidential?

I take privacy seriously. Information is kept confidential within the limits of the law and ethical advocacy practices. If there are any limits to confidentiality, those will be discussed clearly and upfront.

Do you work with perpetrators or abusers?

No. My services are for survivors and those impacted by abuse. I do not provide services to people seeking to justify, minimize, or continue abusive behavior.

What if I’m not in immediate danger but still struggling?

You do not need to be in crisis to seek support. Many people reach out while trying to make sense of their situation or recover from past abuse. Both are valid reasons to seek advocacy.

What if I need help you can’t provide?

If your needs fall outside my scope, I will be honest and, when possible, help you identify resources that may better support you. Ethical care sometimes means helping you find the right help—even if it isn’t me.

FAQs for Faith Leaders, Churches, and Organizations

What kind of services do you provide to faith communities?

I provide education, consultation, and advocacy support related to domestic violence, coercive control, and abuse dynamics. This may include training, workshops, policy consultation, resource development, survivor-centered guidance, and support for responding to disclosures in ethical, trauma-informed ways.

Is your work therapy or pastoral counseling?

No. I do not provide mental health therapy or pastoral counseling. My work focuses on advocacy, education, and survivor-centered support. I do not diagnose, treat, or provide clinical services, and I do not replace licensed mental health professionals or trained pastoral counselors.

Do you require faith alignment or doctrinal agreement to work together?

No. I work with faith communities across a range of theological perspectives. Collaboration is based on a shared commitment to safety, dignity, accountability, and care for the vulnerable, not doctrinal uniformity.

How do you approach situations where abuse is present in a marriage?

Abuse is not a marital conflict or communication issue—it is a pattern of power and control. I do not support reconciliation, couples counseling, or mediation where abuse is present. Safety, accountability, and survivor autonomy must always come first.

Do you encourage survivors to stay or leave relationships?

No. Advocacy does not involve directing survivors to stay or leave. My role is to provide education, clarity, and support so individuals can make informed decisions based on their safety, values, and circumstances—free from pressure or coercion.

How do you address forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoration?

Forgiveness and reconciliation are personal, spiritual processes that cannot be rushed, demanded, or used as conditions for support. Pressuring survivors to forgive, reconcile, or submit in unsafe situations can cause significant harm. Accountability and safety must precede any discussion of restoration.

What is spiritual abuse, and why does it matter?

Spiritual abuse occurs when religious language, doctrine, authority, or community pressure is used to control, silence, shame, or harm someone. This may include misusing scripture to justify abuse or discourage seeking help. Addressing spiritual abuse is essential for protecting survivors and preserving the integrity of faith communities.

What should leaders do if someone discloses abuse?

Listen without judgment. Believe the person. Avoid minimizing, spiritualizing, or questioning their experience. Do not investigate, confront the alleged abuser, or attempt to mediate. Provide resources and referrals and prioritize safety. Consultation and training can help leaders respond appropriately and ethically.

Do you work with abusers or alleged perpetrators?

No. My services are focused on survivors and those impacted by abuse. I do not provide services to individuals seeking to justify, deny, or continue abusive behavior.

How can churches and organizations partner with you?

Partnerships may include trainings, consultations, policy development, speaking engagements, or survivor-informed resource creation. The goal of partnership is to build safer, more informed, and more accountable faith spaces.

Why is outside advocacy important for faith communities?

Survivors often feel unsafe disclosing abuse within their own faith communities due to fear of disbelief, retaliation, or spiritual pressure. Outside advocacy provides neutral, confidential, and survivor-centered support, helping faith leaders respond without causing additional harm.

How does faith inform your advocacy?

My work is guided by the belief that caring for the oppressed, protecting the vulnerable, and confronting injustice are central to faithful living. This informs my commitment to ethical advocacy that upholds dignity, safety, and truth—never control or silence.

You deserve support that is safe, respectful, and empowering. If you’re unsure whether advocacy is right for you, reaching out with questions is always welcome.